The Cyclical Nature of Life and Death

I know my blog has been kind of quiet, lately. It’s been a rough month. I’m hoping that September will be better, because August has been a doozy. I wrote and deleted a slew of posts last month. With my grandfather’s death, my emotions were all over the place. I was angry. I was sad. I was happy. I was mad. I didn’t think anything I wrote was right or fitting. The funny thing is that his was not the first death I endured during the month.

The director of services for the Office of Disability at Wright State passed away. While Jeff and I disagreed on occasion, I’ve known him for over a decade. He helped make the WSU program accepting of people with disabilities. Yes, it still needs work, but this program is a lot further developed than other programs. Particularly, in the last year, Jeff not only chose me to receive a scholarship in his father’s name, due to my work in disability activism on the WSU campus, but I was one of four people chosen to be trained in a public speaking endeavor to bring activism through student leaders to the WSU community. It was an honor to be selected.

Jeff died the week before Willie, but I was out of town and missed his funeral. The week after Willie died, I learned someone I went to WSU with had died from a blood clot. That is a fear many of us in wheelchairs have. She was close to my age, so she was in her early 30s. All this death has reminded me how much I value my life.

I want to live. I’m not ready to go. I have so much more to give this world and the people in it. RIP to those I know who have left the Earth for something better, I hope. I am all the better for knowing you. Each of you have touched my heart and my life, for the better. You will be missed. Especially you, Willie Boy. My heart aches to hear your voice again. I’ll always love you. I know you always loved me. I’m the man I am because of you. You set the bar high..now which me fly.